that ur rhymes are wack...HAHAHAA!
(i used to use that line when i freestyle battled peoples)
THANKS-IS-A-GIVING!! the 2008 PRE-NYE REVIEW
this has been a great year, aside from the few lil pests and speed bumps in the way. but what i learned from those speed bumps, is that it grounds me. if i get over inflated, it takes me back down to earth to realize that i need to be a lil more humble. but over all its has been a great year, i took my group to new levels, ive gotten recognition as a DJ now...im just not some faceless name on a flyer. and it feels good....to a point. dont get me wrong im 100 % thankful for all that has happened. but honestly it feels like nuttin without someone to share it with.
as ive told many people before, who say "man i envy you" or "dude you are soo cool cuz you hang out with all these chicks" true. i love these girls, but these girls are just...my friends. i aint bangin any of them, the most action i can get from these girls is prolly a kiss...or a tity or ass grab..haha (though i face adversity, i still can laugh at myself) not to bring down the mood, but I LOVE the holidays. i love getting together with family and friends talkin bout nuttin at all. sittin next to fireplaces as christmas music plays in the backgroud, sippin hotchocolate as the lil kids play with their new toys, looking at the table fixed with the traditional Turkey and ham and even the not soo traditionan Pancit. i LOVE it I LOVE IT ALL. even if im opening one present...or 10. i dont care, the feelin of the holidays hit me hard!
all except one. this is prolly the only thing i really can complain about. i touched on it on a previous blog, the lonely factor. i ask for stuff every year, im i honestly dont expect to get any of it. which softens the blow when i actually dont get any of it. hahaha. but ive always wanted someone to share the holidays with. when i hang out with my friends and family, they all have significant others. and then theres single ass christian. they all exchange presents and i usually get something nice from my parents but they all get things they all want. dont get its twisted im not complaining that i dont get presents and shit, cuz i do. but to me giving and watching someone you love, happy absolutely happy, that they received what they wanted. none the less from you. if u recieve something from me, believe me its because i put thought into it. my gift is the reaction you get when u open something from me. i always say, cost doesnt matter to me, as long as i myself can afford it. im practical...im not gonna buy you a car unless i can afford it. get the point.
but what im really saying is that each year i ask for basically the same thing, material goods. but deep down im hoping for a girlfriend...someone i can enjoy the holidays with and practically the rest of the year. all im saying it would be nice. please excuse the gay moment: but watching this wedding video a friend sent me got me thinking, "when will i have that and be that happy?" lets face it, everyone says im young, but life doesnt work that way, you get older....i think the repeated mis-steps ive had in life with relationships is finally breaking me down. im losing hope and it is fading fast...
Thank you all for being a part(y) of my life this year. im thankful i have all of you in my life. lets look foward in having a great holiday season and a great new year approaching!
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Back then.....
its werid....
back then the girls that i thought in high school who had big tits.......really didnt have BIG TITS...
and the girls i thought were sooooo HOT.....cant hold a candle to the girls i know now....
go figure....
"back then hoes didnt want me, now im hot hoes all on me!"
moral of this story....girls have big tits and look fuckin hot!
back then the girls that i thought in high school who had big tits.......really didnt have BIG TITS...
and the girls i thought were sooooo HOT.....cant hold a candle to the girls i know now....
go figure....
"back then hoes didnt want me, now im hot hoes all on me!"
moral of this story....girls have big tits and look fuckin hot!
LATE NIGHT RANTS....2:40AM
i cant sleep. so in this attempt im trying to think and write of the most delirious stuff just off the top of my head, imma just keep writing and flowing. so it might not make sense or it might. who knows.
here we go:
im generally a friendly person, but i really dont like when people prejudge who i am. by lookin at me. fuckin talk to me first, i had this incident, which i could totally be taking out of context, but at a club event, i was simply waitin for my friends who are gogo dancers to get dressed. saw them in the room ALL FULLY DRESSED. so i stuck my head in the room and said a kinda "lets fuckin make like a tree and get the fuck outta here" another gogo, who shall remain nameless comes up behind me and repeats in a ticked off tone or like an irritated tone "Really...really? come on now really?"...no i dunno what the fuck was going on but imma take that as disrespect. FUCK HER. she dont kno me, plus everyone in that room was a friend of mine. SO FUCK YOU...even tho shes was damn hot and her body was bangin 9 ways from sunday. FUCK YOU. but then again she coulda been talkin bout something else.
i guess i have the issue about assuming things to be incorrect. sometimes im right some times im wrong, but i tend to go with my gut....id say ive had a 69%-tile of assuming the correct thing. but who cares right?
i cleaned my room today...moved my bed closer to the wall to give me that extra Ft of space between the dresser and my bed. in conclusion i need a BIGGER ROOM.....or buy a house.
being that it is 2:48 in the am. im deciding NOT to go to work in like 3 hours. it was werid, i was awake all day even slept in a lil bit and i around 8pm i was fallin asleep like in the fuckin middle of Monday Night Football. soo disappointed in myself.
my 26th birthday is fast approaching, i thought about this alot. like am i where i want to be at 25, was this what i seen my life to be at 25. NO...honestly i didnt kno what the hell a 25 year old was doing when i was like 6. cuz, i didnt kno any. i was too busy wakin up to watch Nicklelodeon in the morning. 26, i think is an age where you cant really consider yourself young anymore, but i can really call myself old either. the young people call me old, the older people call me young. 25 that was the prime, so what happens now, does my life just go down hill from here? 4 more years to 30 and what do i have to show for myself. so i better fuckin finish radiology school or get a big break as some all star international Kareoke singer....oops i mean DJ.
DJING....how far is this really gonna take me. am i just being discouraged because i work with retards, obviously you kno which ones im talkin about. some days i wish i just never started the group and just did my own thing by myself. but i sleep in the bed that i made.
personal life. you all obviously kno that im in like with someone at the moment. when i first met her, i really believed "that she was waaay too hot and just dont even try" but with all the fucked up shit thats been happening to me and people i know, whats it to give it a try. i wanna say i fell in love with her at first site, but i didnt. i thought she was pretty and all that. but i think it took a while and it took me to get to know her more for me to absolutely fall in love with her. she is gorgeous already, but just getting to kno her made her more beautiful 10 fold. she doesnt know i like her, or maybe she does (there i go assuming again). but i havent had enuff never to tell her whats up. honestly when it first started i just hoped that i liked her, but as time passed ive learned that i love her. and the fact of that matter is the longer i wait the harder im going to fall. see my predicament?!?! but thats the least of my worries. i want to tell her as sort of a stress release. but im still scarred of her reaction and the fallout of whats to come. the holidays are coming up and i really want to be some what happy this year. i try to build up the holidays as some happy family time fun faire. but in actually im totally depressed during the holidays. for one fact that im no longer a child, so presents are scarace. EVEN WITH THE BIRTHDAY in DEC. but ive learned to accept that fact. second, my family has lost quite a few memebers to death and the holidays really arent that chipper like they once were. its horrible to think like that but its true. and figuring that i havent had a gf in YEARS....the holidays are just extra lonely for me. i wish i had someone to shower gifts on christmas morning or to go to her family's house on thanksgiving, or even someone to kiss at new years. but back to the point at hand, i have been giving this thought, like if i really like her or if she is just conveinence. i kno the holidays are coming up and it would be nice. BUT i started liking her a while back. now is she some kinda replacement for a former love. NO. not really because my "former" love and are just fine and im not really hardcore into her ne more. Now am i just used to her? i dunno. i really cant answer that. i want to say no. but what would entitle me to say that i was used to her. i do miss her when i dont see her and i miss her when we dont talk. is that reason enuff? now i gotta admitt im not the shake-clamy-lil-wet-behind-the-ears guy i was in high school and maybe some parts of college. this is a new me. ive seen ive dated and i kno what i want. and to question how i feel about someone now, just makes it more serious. if i question myself, that just means that im willing and ready and that she exhibits everything that i want and need in a woman. and hopefully i am everything she needs in a man. kinda complicated, but in my mind is works out right 100%. ive given it plenty of thought, its more than a crush. now only if i can bring my pussy self to tell her. help anyone please!
ok...im a lil bit sleepy now....thanks for listening
here we go:
im generally a friendly person, but i really dont like when people prejudge who i am. by lookin at me. fuckin talk to me first, i had this incident, which i could totally be taking out of context, but at a club event, i was simply waitin for my friends who are gogo dancers to get dressed. saw them in the room ALL FULLY DRESSED. so i stuck my head in the room and said a kinda "lets fuckin make like a tree and get the fuck outta here" another gogo, who shall remain nameless comes up behind me and repeats in a ticked off tone or like an irritated tone "Really...really? come on now really?"...no i dunno what the fuck was going on but imma take that as disrespect. FUCK HER. she dont kno me, plus everyone in that room was a friend of mine. SO FUCK YOU...even tho shes was damn hot and her body was bangin 9 ways from sunday. FUCK YOU. but then again she coulda been talkin bout something else.
i guess i have the issue about assuming things to be incorrect. sometimes im right some times im wrong, but i tend to go with my gut....id say ive had a 69%-tile of assuming the correct thing. but who cares right?
i cleaned my room today...moved my bed closer to the wall to give me that extra Ft of space between the dresser and my bed. in conclusion i need a BIGGER ROOM.....or buy a house.
being that it is 2:48 in the am. im deciding NOT to go to work in like 3 hours. it was werid, i was awake all day even slept in a lil bit and i around 8pm i was fallin asleep like in the fuckin middle of Monday Night Football. soo disappointed in myself.
my 26th birthday is fast approaching, i thought about this alot. like am i where i want to be at 25, was this what i seen my life to be at 25. NO...honestly i didnt kno what the hell a 25 year old was doing when i was like 6. cuz, i didnt kno any. i was too busy wakin up to watch Nicklelodeon in the morning. 26, i think is an age where you cant really consider yourself young anymore, but i can really call myself old either. the young people call me old, the older people call me young. 25 that was the prime, so what happens now, does my life just go down hill from here? 4 more years to 30 and what do i have to show for myself. so i better fuckin finish radiology school or get a big break as some all star international Kareoke singer....oops i mean DJ.
DJING....how far is this really gonna take me. am i just being discouraged because i work with retards, obviously you kno which ones im talkin about. some days i wish i just never started the group and just did my own thing by myself. but i sleep in the bed that i made.
personal life. you all obviously kno that im in like with someone at the moment. when i first met her, i really believed "that she was waaay too hot and just dont even try" but with all the fucked up shit thats been happening to me and people i know, whats it to give it a try. i wanna say i fell in love with her at first site, but i didnt. i thought she was pretty and all that. but i think it took a while and it took me to get to know her more for me to absolutely fall in love with her. she is gorgeous already, but just getting to kno her made her more beautiful 10 fold. she doesnt know i like her, or maybe she does (there i go assuming again). but i havent had enuff never to tell her whats up. honestly when it first started i just hoped that i liked her, but as time passed ive learned that i love her. and the fact of that matter is the longer i wait the harder im going to fall. see my predicament?!?! but thats the least of my worries. i want to tell her as sort of a stress release. but im still scarred of her reaction and the fallout of whats to come. the holidays are coming up and i really want to be some what happy this year. i try to build up the holidays as some happy family time fun faire. but in actually im totally depressed during the holidays. for one fact that im no longer a child, so presents are scarace. EVEN WITH THE BIRTHDAY in DEC. but ive learned to accept that fact. second, my family has lost quite a few memebers to death and the holidays really arent that chipper like they once were. its horrible to think like that but its true. and figuring that i havent had a gf in YEARS....the holidays are just extra lonely for me. i wish i had someone to shower gifts on christmas morning or to go to her family's house on thanksgiving, or even someone to kiss at new years. but back to the point at hand, i have been giving this thought, like if i really like her or if she is just conveinence. i kno the holidays are coming up and it would be nice. BUT i started liking her a while back. now is she some kinda replacement for a former love. NO. not really because my "former" love and are just fine and im not really hardcore into her ne more. Now am i just used to her? i dunno. i really cant answer that. i want to say no. but what would entitle me to say that i was used to her. i do miss her when i dont see her and i miss her when we dont talk. is that reason enuff? now i gotta admitt im not the shake-clamy-lil-wet-behind-the-ears guy i was in high school and maybe some parts of college. this is a new me. ive seen ive dated and i kno what i want. and to question how i feel about someone now, just makes it more serious. if i question myself, that just means that im willing and ready and that she exhibits everything that i want and need in a woman. and hopefully i am everything she needs in a man. kinda complicated, but in my mind is works out right 100%. ive given it plenty of thought, its more than a crush. now only if i can bring my pussy self to tell her. help anyone please!
ok...im a lil bit sleepy now....thanks for listening
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
THIS SUMS UP ALOT OF THINGS
"...We are not enemies, but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection..."
-Abraham "I got five on it" Lincolon
-Abraham "I got five on it" Lincolon
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
i learned about you in Social Studies!
at first i really didnt believe that my voice would be heard in any election. when i was a wee lad back at St. Lawrence O'toole in the 7th grade, we took the whole year to study the American Government, which also included a field trip to Washington, DC our nations capital. learning my VOTE for any presidental race really didnt matter in a sense that the president is elected by electoral college. living in california the vote will go to the democratic candidate.
in all honestly i didnt care for the American government. thinking it did nothing for me nor did nothing for my family. after many years of thinking and basically bullshittin my vote, i realized that this country is the greatest nation. puttin aside, the lying and the bullshit, the wars and conflicts, the things they may or maynot be hiding from its people. this is a great nation. compared to other places where poverty is the main population, where free speach is punishable by death. where healthcare is either very limited or unavailable. or where any religion can be practiced freely...understand. although things may not go a way we planned none the less, this country has given us more FREEDOM than any country could ever give. so dont complain that something didnt go your way, get out there and do something...vote. that is the beauty of this nation. change is in the hands of the people.
in all honestly i didnt care for the American government. thinking it did nothing for me nor did nothing for my family. after many years of thinking and basically bullshittin my vote, i realized that this country is the greatest nation. puttin aside, the lying and the bullshit, the wars and conflicts, the things they may or maynot be hiding from its people. this is a great nation. compared to other places where poverty is the main population, where free speach is punishable by death. where healthcare is either very limited or unavailable. or where any religion can be practiced freely...understand. although things may not go a way we planned none the less, this country has given us more FREEDOM than any country could ever give. so dont complain that something didnt go your way, get out there and do something...vote. that is the beauty of this nation. change is in the hands of the people.
Saturday, November 1, 2008
the ever expanding mind
i had a awesome time last night. i love SF and the Bay area you people know how to party. so last night i did double duty @ two nightclubs on Great Hallows-eve (Halloween for the retards). Started @ Bambuddha....ended @ Heights. took a $6 cab to it.
today i woke up @ 2pm. that has been the first time in SOOO long i got to sleep in till 2pm. but in a sense i feel hella tired and i feel like i missed half the day. which is all very true. i did miss half the day. on top of that, its fuckin raining. and not really like sprinkling type...like fuckin raining. depressing rain. maybe thats why i feel like shit. im also pretty sore too from some hardcore workin out yesterday. which i'll prolly do in a few mins.
blah i dont feel like doing nething tonight. chill watch a movie. other than going to a club.
we'll see how this goes.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
