why trust...why trust the heart?
i had a talk with my best friends last night. one of the messages i got out of it is that i need to put my head over my heart. but i like to think that thats what separates me from other people. i love. i love whole-heartedly. i understand that love will hurt. the greatest thing in this world is love...why not risk that hurt for it? like i said i guess that whats makes me different from everyone else. i'll be a fool for love.
i feel empty, i feel alone, i feel angry, i feel sad...i feel lost...i feel numb. i cant eat, i cant sleep without gettin drunk. and all i think about is her. everyone reminds me that its not my fault. but why does it feel that way. i know its not.
i just wanted to make her happy. thats all. be there for her. love her.
im just being positive...or maybe its wishful thinking.
but i dont want to be over her...i dont want to give her up.....
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2 comments:
Just wanted to say that I know what you are going through. As weird as that is from a perfect stranger who randomly came across your blog. I wont tell you it gets easier, cause I hated when everyone told me that. But here it is. Of course you should live by your heart, how else can you? But you have to ask yourself if that is trully what you are doing? I myself covered up a lot with that sentiment. There is a reason why your relationship is over. Take the time to assess it. And take your time! If you can honestly answer first of all that you love yourself, that you have built and established a relationship with yourself move on to question number two. Why did you/ do you love her? Really. Because it doesn't seem like she shares your outlook on the heart. And number three, if you can understand why you do and still be at peace with that, maybe its only that she isn't able to truthfully answer those questions for herself. In that case its not your place to be with her.
Just a little of what I know after 6 months of this.
thank you, i havent revisted my blog for a few months, because i wrote this. but thank you for reading and your comment gave me more insight on this matter and yes many months later and im still struggling with this, but im doing a whole lot better.
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